305 Lovin' Read online

  Jaquan’s mother, Ms. Debra and I were very close but I didn’t tell her little sneaky ass everything because she would go right back and tell Jaquan everything that I’d said. I remember one time I told her I went on a date and her ass was so quick to hang up that phone and tell her son. His crazy ass was at my door the very next day trying to kill my ass. That’s a nigga for your ass, because he can parlay that bitch of his around but let him find out that I was dating, shit would turn into World War III real fast. Jaquan was very selfish and possessive when it came to me. He claimed that he does that because he didn’t want no other nigga around China but I knew he did it because he didn’t want to see me happy with another nigga.

  As far as the store that I have, it’s located in downtown Miami and it’s called “Lil Divas.” Ever since I could remember, I had always had a passion for fashion, especially little kids’ clothing but I preferred little girls’ clothing the most. My store was pretty big and we were open Monday through Friday from 9-7, Saturdays from 10-8 and Sundays, 11-5. I loved everything about my job but the thing that I loved the most was to be able to say that this was mine. I promise, after China, this was the best gift that Jaquan could have ever given to me. The clothes in my store ranged from infants up to 12 years old. I’d always felt that some of the clothes that little girls wore now were a little too grown for their age but the stuff I sold was still cute, but it was appropriate as well.

  “China, that’s not what I picked out for you to wear. Where is the dress that I laid on your bed?” I asked my six-year-old daughter as she stood in front of me with a pair of tan Burberry shorts on and a red and white Burberry collared shirt. On her feet were a pair of red Timberland boots that her dad had given her last week when he took her shopping.

  “I know, mommy, but I wanted to wear my new outfit,” she said, batting those long eyelashes at me and giving me her famous smile. That same smile that would cause me to spend unnecessary money on her because I couldn’t seem to tell her no whenever she gave me that smile, showing off those deep dimples.

  I looked down at my daughter and shook my head. My daughter was absolutely beautiful and I’m not just saying that shit because I birthed her, I’m saying it because it’s the actual truth. She was the spitting image of her daddy, though. She inherited his dimples, his hazel eyes and his height. My baby was going to be so tall when she got older. Hell, she was almost my height now. The only thing my baby inherited from me was her good, long, pretty hair that I kept braided and her slick ass mouth that I had to occasionally pop her in.

  “Okay, well make up this bed and meet me downstairs because your daddy will be here in a minute” I told her, walking from out of the room.

  Jaquan was spending time with us today before he got back into the studio later on. With Jaquan now being one of the hottest rappers in the game, his ass stayed on the go and China and I barely had time to see him. As I was heading downstairs of my 4-bedroom, 3-bathroom family home, I saw the front door open. I looked and it was none other than my fine ass, thugged out baby daddy. He was wearing a pair of army fatigue joggers that hung off of his ass so that I could see his yellow polo boxers with a white V-neck and a pair of tan Timberlands on his feet. He had a Cuban link necklace around his neck and a big faced Rolex shining on his wrist. I swear this man got finer and finer every time I saw him. I promise that TV did him no justice because he was even more handsome in person.

  “Baby daddy can’t get no love?” Jaquan asked me, stepping into the house and closing the door behind him.

  I smiled shyly, dropped my heels on the floor that I had in my hands and made my way over in his direction, wrapping my arms around his neck once I reached him. I don’t know what came over me but I didn’t realize that I missed him this much up until now. Having his tall frame tower over my small body felt so perfect. His Dolce & Gabbana Velvet Desert cologne invaded my nostrils and I sank into his arms. At that moment, in his arms right, there was no place that I would rather be.

  “If you was my girl, I would take you into that kitchen and fuck the shit out of your ass because I can tell how much you missed daddy,” Jaquan cockily said as he grabbed a handful of my ass, and I didn’t stop him, either. For that moment, I wished that I was his girl so that I could take him up on his offer.

  No matter how much Jaquan and I might flirt around, I was not about to fuck him because I knew that I would become too attached and I didn’t want that to happen. I just accepted the fact that we were no longer together like that and I wasn’t trying to play with my feelings like that. Because once I opened up my legs for him, shit was going to get real.

  I didn’t even get to say anything back to his ass because all of a sudden we heard, “Daddy!!!” followed by the sound of beads shaking from the ends of my daughter’s hair. She quickly ran down the stairs and I moved out of her way as she jumped on her dad. “Daddy, I missed you so much!” my daughter said and it wasn’t until I looked at her that I realized that she was crying. My baby was so happy to see her dad that her emotions had gotten the best of her.

  I stood back in awe and watched as the two of them stayed wrapped up into each other’s arms. No matter how thugged out Jaquan was and how much profanity he used in his lyrics, calling woman all types of bitches and hoes, when it came down to our daughter, he was able to lose all toughness and be so loving and gentle towards her.

  “I missed you, too, lil mama. You been being good for mommy?” Jaquan asked her and she nodded her head yes.

  After they finished talking, I went back over to grab my shoes so that I could put them on. I was wearing a pair of white skin tight skinny jeans from Guess with a white baby tee. My belly button piercing shined and my toned abs were fairly visible with the shirt that I was wearing. I slipped on my gold heels from Steve Madden and retrieved my brown MCM purse from the couch and we were headed out the door. Today Jaquan was riding in his 2015 Bentley Continental GT.

  “You got my baby booster in there?” I asked him, holding my daughter’s hand as we made it outside to the car.

  “Yeah, I brought it with me on the way over here,” he said, taking China and putting her in her booster seat.

  My daughter swore up and down that she was a big girl and that she didn’t need to sit in her booster seat, but I’m a mother, a concerned mother at that, and her lil ass was going to be in that booster seat until it was time for her go grow out of it. After putting China in her seat, Jaquan came around, opened my door for me and let me in. After he got in the car, he started it and sped off. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that I absolutely hated riding with his ass because he drove so fuckin wild. China, on the other hand, loved that shit because she was wild just like him.

  “Where are we going, anyways?” I asked, looking over in his direction.

  “We going to go have breakfast at Yard Bird on Ocean Drive,” he said, nodding his head.

  As we were driving, I looked down at my phone and it was my best friend Toya calling me. I contemplated if I should pick up the phone because if I told her I was with my baby daddy, I knew she would start talking hella shit. Toya liked Jaquan and vice versa, but their asses stayed getting into it and clowning each other.

  “Hey, girl,” I said, answering the phone and looking back at my baby to see what she was doing. She had the headphones in her ear as she watched the TV that was mounted into the driver’s seat of the car.

  “Charlie, Charlie, what’s up? What you doing?” she asked me, sounding all loud and shit.

  “With Jaquan and China, we on our way to breakfast,” I said, smiling.

  “Bitches be like, ‘I don’t love my baby daddy. We just trying to spend time with him before he get back on the road,’” Toya said, trying to be funny.

  Laughing, I asked her, “Hoe, shut up. What you called me for?”

  “Girl, remember that fine ass nigga Tracy that we saw at the club that night that was trying to talk to you with the dreads?” Toya asked me and I shook my head as if she could see me through the phone.r />
  “No, I don’t know who you talking about,” I told her honestly. Not trying to sound arrogant but shit, niggas tried to talk to me all the fuckin time, so how the hell was I supposed to remember that? She had to be more specific.

  “Girl, the nigga that was in Club Liv the other night. Remember, he had sent a bottle over to our table and he was wearing that all black Robin outfit,” Toya said and then I remembered who she was talking about. I mean, he was fine but he wasn’t my type. He looked like the type of nigga that had to prove to everybody that he had money, which is why he sent that expensive ass bottle of 1738 over to our table. It’s like, who the fuck does that? Plus, I had enough money to buy everybody in the fuckin club a drink.

  “I remember who you talking about. Don’t give that nigga my number,” I said to Toya and I could hear her suck her teeth.

  “Bitch, your ass is so boring. That nigga was fine as fuck and he said he wants you. He told my cousin Man Man and of course, I had to get your permission first. I wasn’t just about to be handing your number out their like that,” she said.

  “Toya, I’m good….” I started but Jaquan snatched the phone from my ear.

  “Toya, why you calling my baby mama with that shit? Don’t be trying to hook her up with no lame ass nigga! She already said she didn’t want that nigga number so stop asking her that shit, man,” Jaquan said into the phone angrily and I looked at his ass like he had just lost his mind. Toya said something and he laughed and a minute later, he hung the phone up. I watched as he went and put my phone in his pocket.

  “Umm, nigga run me my phone back,” I said to him.

  “Nah, Charlie, I ain’t giving your ass shit,” he said and I reached over to dig my hands in his pocket but he quickly knocked them away. “You out of everybody already know that I don’t let nobody go in my pockets. Sit the fuck back, man, so a nigga can concentrate,” he said, looking at me instead of the road.

  “I don’t understand why you took my phone, though. I’m not Chantel, you ain’t finna be taking shit from me,” I said angrily.

  “You be quick to bring that bitch up. Honestly, I don’t give a fuck who Chantel talk to. That ain’t my bitch and I’ll be glad when you realize that,” he said.

  “So why you always with that bitch if she not your girl? I see that shit on the cover of the magazine last week when ya’ll went shopping at Galleria Mall. Fuck you taking her shopping for if you not claiming her?” I asked, my voice coming off sounding too jealous.

  “Charlie, because I’m fuckin her, that’s why! What? You jealous? You want me to fuck you, too? Because I will,” he said and I looked at him real nasty.

  “Fuck you, I’m not jealous. That’s why when you give me my phone back, I’m going to call Toya back and tell her to give that nigga my number. You be so quick to tell me you fuckin her, well shit, I’m about to start fuckin other niggas too and then throw the shit up in your face and see how you feel about it,” I said angrily. I didn’t mean none of that that had just come out of my mouth, I just wanted his ass to get a glimpse of what the fuck I have to go through. You think I like hearing that the very same dick that took my virginity was now being inside other bitches? I knew Jaquan and I knew that his ass probably fucked a bitch last night, too. He was a fuckin rapper, a new and sexy rapper at that, so I knew he stayed slinging his dick around to these nasty, thirsty ass bitches out here.

  “If you want to act like a hoe, then go right ahead! I know you, though, Charlie! And I know you just saying that shit to piss a nigga off. That’s been my pussy for years and it’s going to stay that way. You try to act stupid but you know what the fuck is up,” Jaquan said, followed by a smirk.

  “Keep laughing, nigga. Your ass gone be real hurt when I give this pussy away,” I said, turning back around in my seat and focusing on the road.

  “Charlie, shut the fuck up, please, because you getting on my nerves right now,” Jaquan fussed and I sucked my teeth and didn’t say shit else to his ass.

  I was so glad that our daughter had her headphones in and wasn’t paying us any attention because I hated to curse around my daughter. I felt like it was bad parenting and I didn’t want her repeating things that she would hear us say. Hell, I didn’t even let her ass listen to Jaquan’s music because it was too much for her. But that didn’t stop Jaquan because he would always sneak and let her hear it and she would know all the words within a day or so.

  Thirty minutes later, we were pulling up to Yard Bird and we waited to give the valet our car. Literally, as soon as we stepped out of the car, paparazzi came snapping pictures and firing off question after question.

  “Is it true that you and your child’s mother are getting back together, Quan?”

  “What about your girlfriend that you’re always with, going shopping and taking her on tour with you?”

  “When are you going to drop your next album, Quan?”

  I swear that shit was so annoying and this is why I hated going out in public with Jaquan and plus, it always scared my baby. Jaquan stayed with China wrapped up in his arms with her head buried against his neck, while he made me walk in front of him with his hand resting on my lower back. I could not understand how Jaquan went through this shit on a daily basis. I couldn’t even stand to bear it for a second.

  “Oh my God, it’s Quan! It’s Quan!” the waiter at the front desk shouted as soon as we stepped inside and everybody in the restaurant turned and looked our way. People started pulling out their phones snapping pictures, while others just simply stared in awe. A few of them even ran up to him, asking for his autograph but he told them that he was with his family and that he would do that another time. That was another thing that I loved about him, no matter what, he always put his family first. Niggas nowadays weren’t doing shit like that, especially not a rapper.

  After the waitress finally got her hyper ass under control, she directed us to our table. After she sat us down, I heard two teenage girls sitting down talking about us. They were sitting behind us but I could hear their conversation loud and clear. They wasn’t even trying to be discreet about the shit. They looked to be no older than 17 or 18.

  “Girl, who is that with my man?” one of the girl asked, referring to Jaquan. I smirked and waited to hear what the other female was going to say.

  “Girl, are you crazy? That’s his fine ass baby mama, Charlie. From what I heard, they not together but word on the street is he don’t play about her ass. That song that he got called ‘My Thugged Out Bitch,’ he wrote that for her because remember when he was like, ‘She my thugged out bitch! I swear to God that red hair to something to a nigga and if a nigga even look at my bitch, he taking these slugs from my trigga,’” the other girl announced, rapping along to Jaquan’s song. I smiled because that was actually one of my favorite songs from him because I knew he wrote it for me.

  I tuned them out and paid attention to the waitress as she made her way back over. “Hello, I’ll be your waitress. My name is Melissa. Can I start you all off with something to drink or are you ready to order?” she asked, the whole time her eyes were on my baby daddy. I swear, these little hoes were brave as fuck.

  “Naw, we ready to order. She’s going to have,” Jaquan said, focusing his attention on me, “the shrimp n’ grits. She doesn’t want any of the roasted tomatoes and make sure you put extra cheese on her grits. For her drink, she would like an orange juice with no pulp, oh yeah, and no ice. My princess is going to have the dulce de leche strawberry waffle with an apple juice. I’m going to have the shrimp n’ grits as well, double shrimp with a Sprite,” Jaquan said, knowing what everybody wanted already. I smirked at him because his ass swore he knew every fuckin thing.

  Jaquan and China made small talk while they waited for the food to arrive and I played the backfield and just watched the two of them interact. After our food came, we ate and like Jaquan promised, he signed a few autographs and took pictures with some of his fans. I was holding my baby in my arms as we watched him and he finished up at th
e same time the valet came, pulling his car back in front of the restaurant. After breakfast, we headed to Galleria Mall where Jaquan took us shopping. I didn’t need anything but I somehow managed to leave with two hands full of bags when we were leaving. Of course, he was bombarded with fans and shit while we were at the mall, too.

  “Jaquan, why don’t you just get a bodyguard? I mean, wouldn’t that be more convenient, especially when you have China with you? You know she hates that shit,” I fussed as we made our way back to the car.

  “This my fuckin city. Fuck I need a bodyguard for? That shit is for pussies. You don’t need no bodyguard when you got this!” Jaquan said, lifting up his shirt and showing me his gun. I was carrying my baby and she was knocked out. I didn’t even respond to his ass, I just shook my head and let him put the bags in the car.

  After getting in the car, we took our baby to Dave and Buster’s, to the movies and at eight p.m., we were pulling back up to my house. What I respected about Jaquan was the fact that he didn’t let this money change him. Even though he was famous, he still had the same tendencies that he used to do when he was broke. He went out and had a good time like normal people. He didn’t have to rent out the whole Dave and Buster’s just for the three of us or the movie theater, even though he could. What I didn’t respect about most famous people now was the fact that once they got rich and famous, they forgot where the fuck they came from. Not Jaquan, though. I swear his ass is quick to let a nigga know that he was indeed born and raised in Liberty City.

  Pulling up to the house, Jaquan parked his car in my driveway and shut the car off. He went around to the back and got our sleeping daughter from out of her seat while I walked in front of him to open up the front door to my house. After opening the door and turning off the alarm, I stood in the foyer of the house and waited for Jaquan to come back down from putting our daughter to bed. Ten minutes later, he was coming down the steps and I walked with him outside so that we could bring the shopping bags in the house. Once we were done, I stood on the porch with him with my hand out.